Archive for April, 2012

Funny One Liners Sidhuisms

Navjot Singh Sidhu is a former Indian cricket batsman, who took up television commentary and, more recently, politics following his retirement from the game. The funny one liners that are the trademark of his commentary are now popularly called “Sidhuisms” in India. Below is a great collection of his witty analogies and his comments which coined a new word ‘Sidhuism’ and fetched a mention at wikipedia. 1. You cannot make Omlets without breaking the eggs. 2. Come to my parlour said the spider to the fly 3. A dog kennel is no place to hide a sausage 4. You can never unscramble eggs. 5. Fattest pigs go to the butcher first. 6. All that comes from a cow is not milk. 7. This shot was as sweet as tooti frooti! 8. Great feathers make great birds! 9. My idea of a bird is 36-24-36. 10. As innocent as freshly laid eggs. […]

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Posted by Rajj - April 25, 2012 at 2:04 pm

Categories: Funny Quotes, Funny Quotes Life, Funny Quotes Sayings, hilarious quotes   Tags: , , , , ,

Funny Classroom Jokes For Kids

Teacher: Can you tell the most common word students use daily ? Student: Can’t Sir ! Teacher: Brilliant ! absolutely right. TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America MARIA: Here it is. TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America? CLASS: Maria. __________________________________________ TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor? JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables. __________________________________________ TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell ‘crocodile?’ GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L’ TEACHER: No, that’s wrong GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it. __________________________________________ TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water? DONALD: H I J K L M N O. TEACHER: What are you talking about? DONALD: Yesterday you said it’s H to O. __________________________________________ TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn’t have ten years ago. WINNIE: Me! __________________________________________ TEACHER: Glen, why […]

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Posted by Rajj - April 22, 2012 at 3:04 am

Categories: Short Funny Jokes, very funny jokes   Tags: , , ,

Funny Quotes on Life

Time to enjoy somewhat funny quotes on life.. – Sex and alcohol, it fuels the desire but kills the performance…!!! - Trust is like a paper once it’s crumpled it can’t be perfect again… – You never realize what you have till its gone ..Toilet paper is a good example. – People are made to be loved and things are made to be used. The confusion comes when people are used and things are loved. – At any given moment you have the power to say this is not how the story is going to end. – If you live your life fully, you will die only once. But if you are scared of every step, fear will kill you day after day. – Paulo coetho. - ”Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.”- Buddha – When people ask dumb questions, I […]

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Posted by Rajj - April 20, 2012 at 7:40 am

Categories: Funny Quotes, Funny Quotes Life, Funny Quotes Sayings, hilarious quotes   Tags: , ,

Great hilarious quotes by best comedians

You will know the comedians somehow but i guess you haven’t come across great hilarious quotes by these best comedians, enjoy the hilarious quotes …. “If you ever see me getting beaten by the police, put down the video camera and come help me.” –Bobcat Goldthwait “I’ve been doing the Fonda workout: the Peter Fonda workout. That’s where I wake up, take a hit of acid, smoke a joint, and run to my sister’s house and ask her for money.” –Kevin Meaney “My mom said she learned how to swim. Someone took her out in the lake and threw her off the boat. That’s how she learned how to swim. I said, ’Mom, they weren’t trying to teach you how to swim.’ “ –Paula Poundstone “In elementary school, in case of fire you have to line up quietly in a single file line from smallest to tallest. What is the logic? Do tall people burn slower?” –Warren Hutcherson “I have […]

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Posted by Rajj - April 15, 2012 at 5:08 pm

Categories: Funny Quotes, hilarious quotes   Tags: , ,

Very Very Funny Jokes

Here i present you best of some very very funny jokes, of course some you may have read it and LOL before. I guess it will be pretty much fun to read funny jokes and some more short funny jokes here. Going to Heaven One day, three men died and went to hell. Satan was there and the three guys asked to be sent to heaven. However Satan said that only the good people can go to heaven…so he let them give him a question each. If Satan can answer their questions correctly, the person will stay in Hell; but if Satan didnt answer it correctly the person can go to Heaven. So the first person tries. He was a Mathematician, and he gave Satan a very tough maths formula. But Satan solved it in no time. So the mathematician goes to Hell… The second person, who happens to be a scientist, […]

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Posted by Rajj - April 6, 2012 at 11:15 am

Categories: Short Funny Jokes, very funny jokes   Tags: , ,